Dear Queenie,

Some of my family members have a habit of arriving early, a half-hour or more, when we invite them over. They always show up while we are still getting dressed or still cleaning up and cooking.

Queenie, do I have to put food out for them before everyone else arrives? And how can I get dressed if I have to sit there and entertain them?—Unready

Dear Unready,

You could invite them for a half-hour later than everyone else, but that just accepts their rudeness. Besides, they might catch on and start arriving even earlier than they do now.

Try taking advantage of their early arrival by asking them to pitch in and help with whatever still needs to be done while you go to get dressed. As for food, just tell them, "Sorry, the food isn't ready yet" – and you could even ask them to help prepare it.

If that doesn't get them out of the habit of arriving early, just thank them for their help (if any) and consider yourself lucky to have it.