Dear Queenie,

  I met this guy online and we never actually met in person but we were sexting each other. Then I met my boyfriend and when we got together I cut off the online guy and deleted all his messages.

  But last week the online guy sexted me again and I forgot to delete it and my boyfriend saw it and got mad.

  Queenie, how come I’m not allowed to get upset if he spends hours looking at porn online but he can freak out over on stupid sext message?—In hot water

Dear In hot water,

  It’s that old double standard again: Men admire each other for being promiscuous but expect women to be as pure as the driven snow (if anyone in the tropics really understands just what driven snow is and if, in these polluted times, the driven snow is really all that pure). Just whom they expect to be promiscuous with, if all the women are expected to be chaste, is a question only God (if indeed God is a “he”) can answer.

  Seriously, though, if your boyfriend really spends so much time looking at porn but has so little trust in you that he “freaks out” over an ended online “relationship” with someone you never met in person, you might want to consider seriously whether he may turn out to be a control freak and, if so, whether you want to continue your relationship with him.